More Learning Outside the Classroom

One aspect of the PacRim experience that I haven’t touched on yet is the social atmosphere and group dynamic between the 25 of us. Things have changed drastically in each country as some of us become closer, and some of us begin to realize who we are better off avoiding. A little drama is inevitable in such a small group. And yes, in case you’ve been wondering, a few romances have blossomed along the way, none of which I am involved in (thankfully). But my relationships have shifted nonetheless, and I’ve undergone some personal change as well.

I realize that I’ve become more self confident as a result of recent events here. Vietnam wasn’t physically grueling or culturally jarring, but it was tough in other ways. Ultimately, I found that the last month taught me the importance of solid, levelheaded and honest friends. I’m beginning to learn who I can truly rely on here, and exactly which qualities I appreciate and admire in my friends. I’m learning what I need and deserve from my friends, and how to appreciate the friends I have even if they don’t give me all of those things.

On the whole, the social experience has caused very little anxiety for me, thanks to the laid back and appropriately passive attitude I inherited from my dad. I’m learning to take myself and others much less seriously, and to spring back from uncomfortable situations much faster than before. Shit happens, but none of it is really that big of a deal. Realizing this has reminded me of some advice I was given by a previous Pacrimmer before the trip.

Aleisha Smith, with whom I’ve recently become much closer, told me months and months ago that one the most important things to remember on this trip is to be honest with yourself and spend each moment the way you want to spend it. Forget about the group, and forget about the guilt and regret you may place on yourself when you feel like you haven’t taken full advantage of every opportunity. Sometimes you need an afternoon off to write postcards, Skype with your friends, watch a movie or blog! And sometimes a solo adventure through the city is your calling. Of course there are plenty of times when your needs and desires take a backseat to those of the group. But if given the choice, don’t let the way anyone else chooses to spend his or her time influence the way you spend yours. Never ignore what your body tells you you need. You will always be more content and satisfied if you do what you feel is the healthiest for you in that moment, and chances are you wont enjoy whatever it is you’re turning down anyway if you’re not invested in it. This is something I struggle with both at school and on this trip. I’m sure everyone does from time to time. No one wants to be the one who wasn’t in the picture. Especially here, where everyone feels like they must make the most of every situation. But no matter where you are, everyday is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. PacRim doesn’t make that any more true.

Whether I am alone or with the group, I’m trying to adopt a more independent outlook now, and I’m learning to appreciate each experience for what it teaches me.